Whisper, Forbidden Tears
by Angel of Fate1
Summary: [Birthday Gift-fic for Link015, one-shot sequel to "Requiem", songfic to Evanescence's "Whisper"] The final battle, Light... There is one thing this tactician regrets... His death, she was the demise. [Tactician's POV. Don't like it, don't read it.]


Hitomi: Okay, this time I am working on a fanfic. Even though I declared in my bio that I will quit writing in this forsaken place, something's making me move on... I'm not even sure myself.

Mirae: -Narrows eyes- Since when are you so keen on working on a fanfic?

Hitomi: Sorry... Guess it came to good memories when this place used to be in order. And my writing has gone a tad rusty, so don't blame me if I haven't been writing good as I used to. 

Kristine: -WHACK!- Don't say that... -.-# You're very good at writing, and I am sure you haven't lost your touch.

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**Dedication**: And I dedicate this to a special someone since his birthday is today, and since this is possibly my last fanfic, this is dedicated to him as a birthday present.

Link015 (a.k.a. Chris), this is for you. Happy sixteenth birthday.

I apologize that this is angst, but I cannot write humor (Really bad at it. X.x;). Then again, I'm in a good mood right now. A very good mood, so don't worry.

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**Standard Disclaimers Apply**

**I do not own:**

**"Whisper," which belongs to Evanescence.**

**Fire Emblem, obviously.**

**I do, however, own some people that are mentioned here, the tactician especially. Chris owns himself as well as some friends I may mention in here and definitely in the sequel after this. I also own somewhat of the plot since I am recreating it. But I do not own Fire Emblem--Rekka no Ken--as I said, especially when I am writing at the final chapter, even though I am recreating a bit of it as my own work.**

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**Whisper**

**Forbidden Tears**

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_Catch me as I fall  
Say you're here and it's all over now  
Speaking to the atmosphere  
No one's here and I fall into myself  
This truth drives me  
Into madness  
I know I can stop the pain  
If I will it all away_

**

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**

It was still hard to cope up with his loss.

I have kept myself hidden, my face back into that old dark green hood of a robe of a tactician's. And I have been driven--by my own will--to be kept in silence. Grief consumed me now--took over my heart--for what I have done was forbidden...

_Forbidden... _That cursed word took over my mind of what seemed like... Hours? Days? Weeks? Maybe months?

But that was impossible. We just defeated Limstella, the perfect Morph Nergal the Blackheart had created. So it could've been hours. I mean, we're on the Dread Isle now, and my army must've been tired from the fight we had taken upon. Yes, soldiers of all kinds ambushed us, and they kept popping out of nowhere like daisies. So hard those damn reinforcements are...

Limstella, with her Fimbulvetr...

The downfall of Sain, just to protect me from it...

...He didn't make it to see the end of Nergal...

And whose fault do you think it was?

Mine... All of my fault...

I closed my eyes, hoping the tears won't squeeze their way out, as we walked into the drafty, sinister hideout of Nergal the Blackheart. The last time I was here was ages ago... When we were going after Lord Elbert... And when getting Ninian back... I kept my head bowed, hoping nobody wouldn't notice the sadness, not that they cared anyway.

Besides, what did they care? What did the whole army care? They weren't speaking to me anymore--not even Kent--due to the green-armored paladin's death. Only Mirae and Lucius--who seemed to know how my death experience was like since he was the one saying prayers at Sain's funeral, and therefore, were only one of the people who was sympathetic to my plight--spoke to me now, and they're telling me not to blame this death on myself... But Hell, even Master Karel and Mistress Karla weren't speaking to me anymore. I just want to go and die...

What would they care if their dear tactician would die...?

After all, our comrade hadn't made it to the end like he intended to... 

Every feeling I've felt, they'd know my expression as if reading out from a book, it seemed that everyone knew how I was like. However, they don't know I have been hiding part of it. I guess most thought I was emotionless now, but I've been hiding my grief... 

The grief and the guilt which haunts my mind. 

Slowly, insanity... Pure insanity... Slowly injected into me... In a very agonizing way... The truth of Sain's death... My fault... All of my fault... 

Need I remind myself of why I chose to fight and being a tactician too?

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_Don't turn away  
(Don't give in to the pain)  
Don't try to hide  
(Though they're screaming your name)  
Don't close your eyes  
(God knows what lies behind them)  
Don't turn out the light  
(Never sleep never die)_  


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**"STOP TELLING ME WHAT TO DO!!!" My five-year-old voice had echoed in my head. This was a rememberance... The same rememberance that haunted me all of these years of why I had chosen to fight. Sure, I was being taught of thievery and swordplay, but it was not enough practice.**

**"It's not my fault, okay?!" An angry, young male voice shouted back.**

**Both of us lived in this house for as long as I could remember. We were in Etruria at the time, living here in this house, just the two of us. It was nothing special, the house, it was just a cozy cottage secluded on a hill; with two bedrooms, a kitchen and two bathrooms. We were not rich nor poor, but we still earned this roomy house with our well-earned salaries from fighting so hard. Brother had been a sword-user for so long, and from I heard from him since he was muttering to himself, that he would join the Elimine Clergy. It's hard to believe he--because of his demeanor--would join with St. Elimine's followers.**

**I, on the other hand, have been multitasking with my skills that it was hard to choose what to pick. Well... In secret, I've been taught thievery by Mirae, and when brother was not home, I would wander overseas to the scarlet plains to practice swordplay with Master Karel and Mistress Karla. Problem was, I didn't know what to pick out of the two. So I got stuck multitasking.**

**The two of us were ten feet apart from each other in the kitchen, each scarlet in the face. I stood my ground, determined to hear of what he has to say. And my face was completely screwed up in anger, my scarlet-hair locks falling into my golden eyes; tight fists clenched at my sides. I was in my lavendar kimono at the time since I came back from sparring practice.**

**My brother was in his cavalier attire, still a page. His crimson locks--in a tiny ponytail--wouldn't cover the glare of his ice-blue eyes. And those eyes had given me a menancing look, and I'm still sure I have not recovered from that dark look he always gave me when he was mad or something.**

**"Why do you always have to tell me what to do?!" My scream was hysterical, high-pitched as I shook my head furiously. I never liked being told what to do by anyone, even by the idiot who was one year older than I was.**

**"Because," He hissed through clenched teeth. "The Count and Countess Reglay themselves said I am responsible for you now! Since we both refused to be in an orphanage, I have custody of you, whether you like it or not!"**

**"Without my consent?!"**

**"HA! Like you would have a choice!" He triumphed momentarily. "Why should they let a girl like you wander about on the streets as an orphan?!"**

**This time, I almost gave up on arguing with him. But my voice, still high-pitched than it already was, cried, "I still don't see how you're responsible for me! You're not of age! You're still... You're just a kid, Hikaru!"**

**"Whatever, Hitomi! I still have full custody of you by contract and that's that! Now," He jerked his right forefinger up. And I knew what this meant as I hurridely rushed out of the kitchen. "NOW GO TO YOUR ROOM, YOU BRAT!" He barked.**

**Hastily running up the stairs, I bellowed back below the staircase, "I'M ALREADY THERE!" And in another response, I slammed my bedroom door.**

**"ARGH!" I heard him scream in exasperation, and I can just imagine him about to tear his hair out of his scalp in frustration. I threw myself onto my small but cozy bed, screaming loudly into my pillow.**

_¢_

**Tension broke, silence took over of what seemed like forever. What I did now was reading a book of Anima in my room. It seemed rather interesting to read on Spirit Magic. And the wonder of it... I wonder how long it took the Mage-General of Etruria or the Lord Archsage Athos to master spells of Anima... And what had inspired those two to learn this difficult magic. I'm not saying it's as easy as Light or Dark--people refer to call the darkness Elder--magic...**

**A soft knock erupted from my door. Then slowly, an almost silent creak followed it, meaning someone was opening the door. I laid my left hand on the book's page while the right one rested beside me on my bed.**

**"Hey," The familiar voice of Hikaru said in an almost casual--perhaps gentle--tone, which was rare for someone like him. Not looking at him, he sat beside me on the bed. And somewhat of an awkward silence took over. Almost timidly, he held out a plate of what seemed like with bread, cheese, salami, grapes and an apple.**

**"I brought you some food in case you were hungry." He made an effort to show of how much he cared. Still not looking at him, but rather the plate, I decided to make something out of the bread, salami and cheese. With tiny bites, I ate the morsels at a slow pace, feeling good that these tasted really good and that I had food settled within my stomach. My brother smiled rather slightly.**

**After being done with that, I was going to grab the grapes, but I lowered my hand for a moment as I bowed my head.**

**"We're a broken family... Aren't we?" I mumbled, hands clenched into fists again. Surprisingly, Hikaru pulled me into an embrace, and kissed the top of my head.**

**"No, no..." He responded in a soothing voice, stroking my short hair fondly. I fixated my gaze on my older brother, about to cry. But I was astonished when it looked like he was going to burst into tears himself, but he wouldn't... Not in front of me. I guess he wanted to be strong for me.**

**"But Tai, Bane... K-Kiya... Where are they, brother?"**

**"I think," He swallowed hard. "...They're not living anymore. Either they have not heard of us as being their siblings... Or... They went with Mom and Dad." He said the last sentence rather shakily.**

**"...I see..."**

**"Don't worry, sister," He murmured against my hair, still caressing it in an effort to calm me down. "I won't leave you... I can't leave you, we only have each other left, right? Maybe for now until the rest of our siblings find us...?"**

**"..." A tiny nod was my response.**

**"That's it..." He kissed the top of my head again, murmuring softly as he tucked me in snugly in bed. "I want you to grow up... To become a strong and determined woman... I want you to grow up strong... For me, sister..."**

**"Mm..." I nodded tiredly.**

**"Night Hitomi, sister. I love you." He smiled, kissing the top of my head as he snuffed out the candle. In the darkness, I peered at his handsome, boyish face. And I broke off into a smile.**

**"Good-night... Lord Brother... Hikaru. Love you, too..." I said, sitting up to hug him tightly. He hugged back in return as much as I had. And I settled back down to sleep while he closed the door softly and departed to his own room. I had tunneled myself into the blankets, drifting into a deep, calm slumber...**

**...Little did I know was that night was going to change our lives forever....**

**That night was the last night we ever saw each other again...**

**Ever.**

_¢_

**A burning smell had entered my nose. And I was sure I had imagined it... I was so sure, and I was hoping that I was dreaming it.**

**But I was gravely mistaken. As I slowly opened my eyes, blearily rubbing them so to keep myself awake, the smell of burning wood had entered again.**

**"FIRE! FIRE!"**

**"No, you idiot! It's a raid too! Brigands are coming!!!"**

**"You can't be fluxing serious! Hitomi is still inside the house, we got to go save her now!!!"**

**"NO! I forgot she's still sleeping..."**

**"Ngh..." I looked about and choked on the smoky ashes and coughed rather loudly. Fire had consumed my vision, and my eyes were watering. Slowly, wearily, I slumped out of the bed, falling over rather fortunately... Though my arm had caught on fire, it took me almost immediately to put it out but for a few moments. I struggled within the wood that was crashing down the roof. Moving about a great deal with much difficulty, I was trying not to lose air due to the smoke.**

**Through teary eyes, I stumbled upon the front hall, near to the front door. I can hear axes and blades parrying against each other, echoing in the house... So Hikaru was right, there were brigands who were after us. I looked around desperately, I wanted so badly to see my brother. And finally I found him and Takashi going against this ugly brutes.**

**Takashi looked rather pale, but as a thief, he had to take such risks as this. His obsidian eyes flashed dangerously as he struck another bandit in the face, the black-and-white hair in a ponytail swaying after its obsidian-eyed owner. Hikaru was back-to-back with him, apparently striking another bandit. I should've helped, but I was helpless... I looked about for what I wanted, but I couldn't find it.**

**"Hitomi!" Takashi exclaimed, coughing from the smoke as well. Hikaru looked surprised and greatly relieved, giving me a message from his dark-blue eyes. I wanted to find out what he wanted to tell me, but he also told me something.**

**"Get out of here now, Hitomi! If these brigands come after you, I don't know what I'll do! Get out of here!" He commanded to me. I looked at my twin, appalled. I couldn't, I wouldn't... I refused to...**

**"I'm afraid I can't do that!" I managed to retort, despite my coughs.**

**"It's an order, Hitomi," Takashi hissed, striking a mage at the heart. **

**"But I can't! I can't just leave you two here to die!" I wailed.**

**"GET OUT! We had to prepare for this day!" My brother of a page barked at me, striking three bandits while Takashi killed five.**

**"BUT SO SOON?!"**

**"...Look, if I manage to get out of here, I'll come looking for you!"**

**"...You promise...?!"**

**"Yes! And if I don't make it, I want you to grow up for me! Become a woman, struggling to live, despite the odds that are against you!"**

**"...Brother..." Tears were prickling into my eyes, but not from the smoke. My feet stayed rooted to the ground, refusing to do what my brother had ordered.**

**"JUST GET OUT SAFELY! TAKASHI AND I WILL BE FINE!"**

**...And then... I moved.**

**I began scampering about, avoiding all wood that was aiming themselves at my head. With difficulty, I tried opening the front door. Horrified that it was jammed, I had no choice but to ram it down with all of my strength, despite the flames that had consumed it. Yes, sure, my kimono was being eaten away, but my well-being was more important now.**

**Bolting out of the door, my face made contact with dirt. And as I got up, groaning inwardly, I saw our house. Destroyed. Consumed by the blaze...**

**...And yet, I did not hear of Hikaru or Takashi's voices ever again that night. No screams or yelps, just weaponry echoing into my mind. Clashing, and there were some grunts, from the pain of strikes and fatigue. Slowly, I got up to see the house one last time...**

**And I ran away to St. Elimine-who-knows where to guide me... **

**Never looking back.**

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_I'm frightened by what I see  
But somehow I know  
That there's much more to come  
Immobilized by my fear  
And soon to be  
Blinded by tears  
I can stop the pain  
If I will it all away___

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Breathing. It felt good again to breathe than rather of what I had thought about that night... Although I had not heard of those two since, it was rather painful to bear. If their lives had been taken, that should've been my fault too. I took the blame upon myself for being foolish, not fighting with them, for them. The three of us would've probably made it out alive, not just me.

Since then, I was studying into whatever library I can find, to go study battle tactics. And still doing undercover work to fight in any case of a tactician doesn't need soldiers to be defended. A tactician also has to learn how to fight by him or herself, no matter what the case, army or not.

...And the forbidden thing I have done...

...Was fall in love with one of the soldiers in my army...

Which I was not supposed to do.

I watched the battle silently, deciding they can decide for themselves and not have their dear tactician shout out orders. They knew their Weapon Triangles ("triangles" due to the Reverse Triangle and the Trinity of Magic as well)... Strengths and weaknesses... Let one of the Lords command the army now, not me. I don't even deserve to see the end of Nergal. Why couldn't Mirae, Chris--What? He seemed like a good candidate as a Tactician--or one of the Lords take over my place as Tactician? Then Sain would've lived...

...But that would mean I should've been dead...?

Huh, it should've been that way... Sain flirting with the whole flock of girls in the legion until he finds someone he is comfortable if not genuinely infatuated with... The Lords--if not the whole population of the army--would not have me as a burden...

...And Chris...

...He would also find someone else...

...He's better off with Farina anyway, there must be something going on between them... They seem like close friends...

...Did I just declare that...?

I watched intently, Lord Athos summoning rays from the heavens, conquering Nergal's darkness... Beautiful, deadly destruction... Nergal--Nergal, the fiend who have corrupted all of our lives--screaming... Actually screaming in such excruciating pain... Yes, you deserve it. After all of what you and your precious Morphs had done to all of us. Corrupting our lives, tearing us away from our loved ones. And taking away of what I had lost, making me realized I had done something I was not supposed to do. Yes, bleed... Bleed drop by drop for all I care because you deserve it, you bastard.

The flash of St. Elimine herself...

Aureola...

And I cried right there. Silently, nobody not seeing the falling tears from under my hood... Reminiscences flashing... Of all the good times and bad... Lyn's Legions and this one year when we were all reunited again... But I think it all of that went in vain. Sain didn't make it to this end, not making it this far to our final obligation.

I was so stupid to cry out when I was in trouble...

Shards of Fimbulvetr, almost aiming at my helpless self. Limstella, her golden eyes flickering, showing a spark of faint emotion... Smug, cruel satisfaction that I was going to meet my demise. But sorrow, ironically, was there.

And Sain took my hit, gasping for air... And crumpling to the ground, off of his steed... Blood, his blood, dripping from the frozen ice shards...

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_Don't turn away  
(Don't give in to the pain)  
Don't try to hide  
(Though they're screaming your name)  
Don't close your eyes  
(God knows what lies behind them)  
Don't turn out the light  
(Never sleep never die)_

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_

I saw them.

Thank Elimine Ninian was revived thanks to Sir Bramimond. As I saw her freezing three **dragons **to the bone... Yes, Nergal had managed to put three dragons into the world after all, despite his downfall. I watched in silent awe, seeing Ninian lash out a powerful ice-storm, making the hail crash down on all three of the fiery. Two dragons collapsed to the cracked floor, dead on the spot. But now, only one remained. After one thousand years, the Scouring comes again... Or at least it was, but it'll be close to it.

A hidden fear had struck me hard, but I didn't want it to go into control, not like my rememberances; they still occupied my mind. I gazed at the dragon, obviously stunned. Such destructive beauty... And I see this was why Nils and Ninian had to keep quiet of their heritage, but I guess it made the situation more toward out-of-hand. And I just resumed to watch, the hood of my robe shadowing my eyes. But somehow, my golden eyes pierced through the darkness, a wary expression.

Lord Eliwood was shouting, "Okay! Everyone, prepare for this!"

But Lady Lyndis protested, "But Eliwood, it is only us four who can fight the dragon! I don't think the rest of the army can slay this behemoth... They'll get killed, otherwise!"

Lord Hector nodded, "She has a point, Eliwood." He agreed. "I think it is only us and Lord Athos who can truly slay this beast."

"I suppose you're right... Everyone, stand back. Healers, you come up front in case of any injuries."

Lucius, Erk, Priscilla and Nino step up but to a safe distance in case they were going to get assaulted by the dragon as well. It's a good thing they have their Restore staves... Or Fortify would've worked like a charm, too, but I guess only Sir Renault has it. I'm surprised Nino had stepped up to take healing duty, I thought it would be Serra... Then again, she has become brave, and I'm proud. It took her quite a lot to face her fear of battling her brothers and father... Who have become Morphs now. But at least she has Jaffar and Legault...

'_I think they really are truly better off without me..._' My smile was now cryptic and bittersweet. '_I think I can just go now... I mean, the Lords have taken command... Nobody will have to bother with me, and Sain is resting in peace... So... I think it's best if I do not see the end of my army. I know that... They will defeat the dragon on their own... I know they can do it, I have trained them to their best._' I started to turn away, but something caught me off-guard. I felt like someone was watching me, and it was such an eerie feeling that took hold of me for a moment. I looked up, and the dragon leered at me.

'_Wha...?_' I felt repulsed and afraid. What did this one want? I thought it was going to make its moves to the Lords outright as well as the rest of the army who may dare to get themselves killed. Instead, the dragon is looking at me... As if it's wondering what is my purpose is with the army. It kept leering at me, the piercing orbs intensifying. And all I can do was stare back...

By then, Mirae took a good look at me. The Lords just peered at me over their shoulders, but they did not say anything. For some reason, that got me infuriated when the Lords just looked at me skeptically. Just because Sain died and that it was my f--cking fault doesn't mean they had a right to hold a grudge against me. I can be only human to make that mistake, for me to be his demise. Oh, why did I fall in love...?

'_Because you were... That can't be helped,_' A thought of reasoning came to me. That was true, I was in love with the flirty knight, despite the fact he did flirt with every girl in the army. He was always liked that, and that used to make me so mad and yet jealous. But right now, I don't know what to really think about on it. He probably truly loved me, that couldn't be helped either.

But I caused his downfall... Does he forgive me, even in Death?

As if to dare, I took some steps forward. The army now was watching intently, but they're still on their guard. What did they care. And involuntarily (since I didn't have a sword of my own now), I took the Regal Blade from Master Karel. At the corner of my eyes, his eyebrows were raised in mild surprise--so not like him--but he stayed silent. Mistress Karla was watching me too--I can feel it--but she, too, said nothing. Revealing my face, I took off the hood that shadowed it. And I glared back, to the dragon.

I think I was hypnotized, the dragon and I neither moved. I just... I didn't know what I was doing, and I didn't even know if it was foolish. Taking more steps, I held the Regal Blade's hilt tightly, I was now at the sides of the Lords. Lyn was looking at me, confusion in her forest green eyes. Eliwood had a face of neutrality, a thin line at his lips, cerulean blue eyes watching me. Hector seemed flabbergasted, stunned. And Lord Athos had a grave but calm look.

I nodded, in silence, and I thrusted my head onward at the dragon to signal them. As if they understood me, they actually obeyed. They actually obeyed their tactician's orders. Eliwood charged with his noble steed, the Durandal outstretched, making contact with the scaly skin. The dragon shrieked a mighty roar, and twice, it had breathed flames on the redheaded lord. I wanted to shriek, I did, but it got caught in my throat. Eyes widened in horror, I signaled Lord Eliwood to pull back.

The injuries looked bad... The flames had burnt his flesh. A lot of burns at the face and his torso... Silently, I motioned again, and at this, Lucius and Erk both healed him with their Restore staves. Eliwood peered at me, his face still indifferent. I felt myself go stiff, I didn't know why. I guess he did go on his own and he didn't seem to not like taking orders from me. I looked quite embarrassed, and I couldn't meet his eyes for moments. But something caught me to look up. His lips... Forming a faint smile, and the eyes looked cheery as well, the old Lord Eliwood I knew before the incident. He smiled at me, and hesitantly, my grin was rather nervous. And as I looked, the other Lords were now smiling at me, with confidence. And my smile grew.

The whole army now slowly went back to normal. Mirae was cheering now, her golden eyes now eager to see the end. Karel had a calm look and Karla looked indifferent, but I thought I saw her smile... The rest of the army now looked like they all wanted to apologize. I shook my scarlet head, as if to tell them that I deserved the silent treatment. Hastily, I turned back to the Lords, a fiery determination developing in me. And my voice was somewhat hoarse now as I have not spoken for what seemed like forever.

"LET'S GO MEET WHAT AWAITS US NOW!" I cried, my voice straining to speak. "LET'S SEIZE THIS HEAD-ON AND MEET THE END!" I pointed a finger foward to the beast. "HECTOR!"

"I got it!" The royal blue-haired lord swung the Armads to his side, charging at the beast. With succession like Lord Eliwood, he managed to strike the beast at the left side, metal and magic making contact with its bumpy flesh once again. And again, it retaliated with two strikes with jets of flame. Telling him to pull back, Priscilla and Nino had healed him as well. I didn't know who to command next... Lyn or Lord Athos. Hmm, Lyn only has the Sol Katti... But it was worth a try. As if she sensed it (my indecision), the noble half-Sacaean took upon the sister-sword of the Mani Katti and lunged, assaulting, though I have probably made a grave mistake that the sister-sword had no effect on the dragon whatsoever since it was not a Legendary Weapon. And once more, the fabled beast struck her. And Lucius and Priscilla healed.

"Did your hair caught aflame?" I asked nervously, disappointed Lady Lyn's viridian green hair may have been caught upon the dragon's fire and had it been my fault. "Are you better?" I panicked about her well-being as well as worrying about everyone else. She smiled at me.

"Just a bit, been lucky to put it out," Her grin grew. "Yes, I'm fine. Glad to have you back to command, Hitomi. It hasn't been the same hearing you."

"No time for the idle banter!" Lord Hector's voice came about. "We have to save Elibe from the brink of destruction!"

"Heh, sorry!" I responded. Looking at Lord Athos, I yelled, "FIRE AWAY!"

Athos took out the book of Forblaze immediately, mumbling its chant calmly. Fire was already beginning to erupt from all around under the dragon, balls of fire flowing upward. The fireballs kept flowing upward and the ground erupted to a fiery inferno, the dragon screeching an ear-piercing snarl in the desolated temple. And in response, once more, it had counter-attacked the Archsage with its flames of death. In alarm, at once, I commanded the healing-duty members to heal the Legendary Hero.

"LORD ATHOS-!" I cried out, but he seemed to be well, although he was halfway of getting back to his normal posture.

"I'm fine, Lady Hitomi," He responded, dusting his robes. "Just concentrate on the task ahead."

"Right!" I nodded, still holding the Regal Blade in my hands. And on and on it went. The Lords attacking, dragon breathing the breath of fire, and healers healing. It kept going on like that, as if it would take us an eternity. Finally, it looked like near the end and I was beside Lord Eliwood. Both of us were going to say something, but jets of fire blasted in my direction. I wanted to dodge, I needed to, but my feet wouldn't move out of the petrified fear it was in. And so, I was consumed in the flames of my robes, voices--loud and soft at the same time, so far away--screaming my name...

I coughed and gasped, struggling to get through this...

To get air...

To get out of the now bigger inferno...

...And to live...

* * *

_Fallen angels at my feet  
Whispered voices at my ear  
Death before my eyes  
Lying next to me I fear  
She beckons me  
Shall I give in  
Upon my end shall I begin  
Forsaking all I've fallen for  
I rise to meet my end___

* * *

"Hitomi..."

_...W-Who's there...?_

"My Scarlet Vision... Don't give in..."

_Who are you...?_ "_Scarlet Vision_"_...? I'm afraid my name has been corrupted in vain... I am no longer the famed fighter as I used to be... I... I want to fall... It's my fault, all of my fault, that I've driven him to his demise..._

My vision, all I can could see was flame. It was becoming rather difficult to take off my robe. The flames shone off a soft shade, and that, too, faded into darkness.

"Don't give up... I can't let you give in to your demise..."

_Please, show me who you are... What is it that you want with me..._

A shadowed figure appeared in my eyes, glowing a holy-lit aura. I couldn't really see, my eyesight filled with the dark, and I hoped it stayed that way. I just wish I didn't choose a life like this, but I had no choice but to do so. And what did happen? I didn't save one of my soldiers out of danger, it was the other way around.

A smile, a cryptic and such a familiar smile, appeared on this person's face. My insides went cold, it was such a familiar gesture, a warm gesture I had only known for two years now. I only saw such a smile, despite the fact that it was a bittersweet, resigned one, when he had died. I wanted so much to see of who this was...

His face began to unveil. Emerald green eyes had shown into the abyss, looking at me sympathetically, worridely and forlornly. Earthy-green locks fall into those eyes, and his torso was covered with familiar armor... Emerald-green armor...

I felt myself struggling to get up, but the flames kept me down. As I managed to slowly go up, the person's arms were around my waist, his hands holding my hands which still had the Regal Blade. I think this one was trying to guide me. I knew his familiar presence, and having him here with me already has tears in my eyes again. I breathed his name, feeling an old strength returning to me, coming back from long ago.

"Sain," I began, but the sound of his voice was enough to keep me silent.

_Shhh, _He soothed, still smiling at me. _I am just here to guide you throughout the battle... And if you think I am not going to see the end, I certainly am! I am here with you right now, aren't I?_

**_Sniff... _**"Sain..." By then, I took off my tactician's robe in the nick of time before another blast of flame, a lavendar kimono underneath. All four healers I have put on healing-duty healed me.

_I am not going to leave you. You still need some guidance..._

And I stood fully, Regal Blade glowing a metallic blue. Everyone was looking at me, stunned.

I needed to meet my end, here and now.

* * *

_Don't turn away  
(Don't give in to the pain)  
Don't try to hide  
(Though they're screaming your name)  
Don't close your eyes  
(God knows what lies behind them)  
Don't turn out the light  
(Never sleep never die)_

_

* * *

_

Golden eyes holding a wary look, I glowered at the dragon, feeling my infuriation boil me to the bone. It was probably out of spite or revenge, maybe both, and I tended to feel a little nasty toward this beautiful, deadly creature of spoken legends. I am guessing that my hatred for Nergal had not been discarded completely, part of it was still there. And I suppose seeing him bleed wasn't enough.

"Bring it on," I hissed to the dragon, Regal Blade armed and ready, Sain still there, guiding me. I swung the blade, making it have contact with the hard hide, at the middle of its face. For a moment, I thought it was not going to work, and that I had made a foolish mistake. And thoughts of cold fury had entered my mind of it. But strangely, the dragon screamed in what seemed like pain... I was somewhat surprised, to say the least, as well as everyone else. We all knew that the Regal Blade was not a legendary weapon...

But how? How did I strike it so clearly?

In fact, how did I strike it in the first place?

...What happened...?

"No way...! How?" Lyn breathed, her tone faint.

"Impossible!" Lord Hector chortled, shaking his plum-colored head with disbelief. "We all know the Regal Blade isn't a Legendary Weapon-"

"But surely," Lord Eliwood was trying to figure out of what has happened, ocean-blue eyes flashing. "That can't be a Legendary Weapon... There are only Eight Heros. And..."

Lord Athos had an unreadeable expression, as if he had been thinking of this for a long time. I can feel his eyes watching me as I struggled to battle in fray, sweat flying from my face. The lavender kimono was burning at the hem, but I guess the air of my motions just swept it away into the little wind in here. The medium-lavendar-shaded sash that was around my waist flapped as I made another stabbing at the dragon, and at this, it shot another flamethrower. And the metallic-blue aura grew around the Regal Blade, a flame of it, maybe a spark...

Sain was guiding me pretty well, but I gasped out of fatigue. I fell on one knee, gasping.

_...!! Hitomi! _Sain was now sounding panicky. Not once did he leave my side, not once. _Are you all right...?!_

**Haah, haah, haah... **"I... I don't know..."

I slowly got up, the blade in my hand rattling violently, warm sweat rolling down my back. At a distance, I heard an arrow being knotched to a bow, to launch an assault. I wearily looked over my shoulder, and he caught my eye, Chris was going to launch an attack with the bow, Rienfleche... It was not like it was going to affect the dragon like Murde, Hanon's bow... But I guess he wanted to help me out of my vulnerable state.

"Hitomi! Don't do this!" Chris was shouting, holding back an arrow.

Why did he not want me to fight the dragon, what did he care...

* * *

_Don't turn away  
(Don't give in to the pain)  
Don't try to hide  
(Though they're screaming your name)  
Don't close your eyes  
(God knows what lies behind them)  
Don't turn out the light  
(Never sleep never die)_

_

* * *

_

I couldn't help but be surprised of his being against my fighting. Well, I don't want anyone to protect me, I want to protect everyone in my army, if not the whole continent of Elibe. I was sick of it all, seeing Death. I had not witness the deaths of Takashi and Hikaru, but there was no way I could see my life--if not others--being destroyed. Lyn's grandfather, Lord Hausen, and Lord Elbert had died by Nergal. Lord Uther, however, died of sickness, but I am too sick of deaths of any form, any kind.

The magnificent blade shook more violently than ever, and at that, I turned to Chris, tears in my eyes. He looked taken aback--perhaps startled--to see me in tears at such a time like this. I was probably doing that out of sadness, grief, and perhaps anger. Towards him, I've thought I would never get angry at him, but I certainly am now. I turned away, scarlet hair following about.

"Don't help me," I said softly, my voice hard as stone as I positioned myself into a fighting stance.

Now he was probably trying to sound reasonable. "Oh, come on, Hitomi! Let me help! You're probably too tired to fight by now..."

My stubborn-streak was taking over, my voice muffled through gritted teeth, "DON'T HELP ME!" Tears--white-hot tears--were mingling with the sudor, rage about to take control of me. Bearing with all burdens in mind, I lunged at the dragon, playing fire with fire.

"Hitomi! No! Don't do this!" Chris's voice echoed, but I didn't listen.

* * *

_Don't turn away  
(Don't give in to the pain)  
Don't try to hide  
(Though they're screaming your name)  
Don't close your eyes  
(God knows what lies behind them)  
Don't turn out the light  
(Never sleep never die)_

_

* * *

_

We were toe-on-toe with each other. It was as if the dragon had sensed what my so-called gift was as a sword-wielder. It certainly didn't really want to take on the descendants of the Legendary Heros and a Legendary Hero, but with a stupid, naive tactician. What gift did I have? Why was I so special? Besides, the legendary behemoth was already weak due to the fact Lyn, Lord Eliwood, Lord Hector and Lord Athos had battled it the whole time. I could take on this thing myself, Sain was there to watch my back.

_Be careful, milady... _Sain murmured. And I couldn't help but grin.

"Don't worry," I whispered back gently, the grace of the swordmaster taking over me just like with those training sessions with Master Karel and Mistress Karla. "I'll be okay," I reassured.

Although, to tell you the truth, I was fatigued as far as it went. It felt like forever, and I wonder if this was how Lord Athos and Lord Bramimond felt... To be fatigued, and yet, not all of the Legendary Heros were alive anyway. It was only just the two of them...

I swung the sword at the sides, stabbing the dragon at the front left leg. It snarled, looking at me with such fiery eyes, so full of hate. It was as if it had despised humans clearly, and I am pretty sure this one was not of Arcadia's dragons, who get along in harmony with humans. I could only stare at it with a quick glance... And with that, my eyes snapped back into focus, full with strength of mind, backing away from the dragon extremely quickly, the blade still positioned into assault.

The dragon beckoned, as if it was actually amused that I--a mere tactician and a fighter from experience--was fighting against it. I bet by now, it was thinking, '_Why does this weak mortal decide to fight against me? No matter, I shall crush her and eat her once I have done so._' And I certainly did not want to be called weak, people had no high hopes for me because a) They didn't know me well or b) They decided to judge me by my appearence. And I am still fed up with that. I certainly didn't want to remember that.

"Hitomi! You're planning your own death! Please stop... For me." I can still hear Chris pleading me to withdraw from this intense match of playing fire with fire. I won't back down, never. Now when I had something to do, something to fulfill.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!" Lord Hector bellowed, Armads clenched tightly in his hand. "WHAT THE RUDDY HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING, HITOMI?! LET US HELP OR SOMETHING!"

"Hitomi..." Lord Eliwood murmured. Lyn kept her concerned light-green gaze on me, nothing to say. Lord Athos said nothing as well.

I won't let them help me. I'll do this on my own. I won't be called weak again. I can't just stand there and command, watching one of my soldiers die. Unable to move out of helplessness and watch one of my loved ones die...

_Revenge is not the answer, milady tactician, _Sain reminded me, and I couldn't help but be bittersweet.

"I'm sorry," I sighed, feeling flame eat upon my flesh, and the familiar cool of healing magic closing the wounds. "It's just that I have been blaming myself upon your death..."

_I did save you for a reason, _He teased lightly, and I felt my sword struck hard at the chest of the dragon, and hearing it roar is going to make me deaf. _I just want you to know... That I want you to live..._

I was glad he was here with me, by my side and in my mind. Perhaps he just wanted to check on me?

And then... I felt pain... A sudden but excruciating pain. I know the dragon did it, I know. The dragon was looking like it was going to drop dead, but its slit-like, bloodshot eyes kept focus on me. And I know that this dragon did something to hurt me for it felt like my body was going to break away...The Regal Blade, stabbed deeply in its throat... 

It was over. For the both of us.

* * *

_Servatis a pereculum  
Servatis a maleficum_

_

* * *

_

I can hear my army screaming my name... Flame extinguished, metallic-blue aura from the Regal Blade gone completely... Sain and Chris, both shouting, all were shouting... A flash of light was there, Light Magic...

Not Aureola... But close to it...?

I... I don't know...

I can hear myself speaking lowly, the breath raspy, my eyes facing the cold-stone floor... A dim light was there in my eyes and I felt like every part of my body was broken... Sticky crimson blood, a pool of it, is on the floor, the dragon's, I suppose, for it had only blistered our flesh with such dark burns...

"I... It's so cold... So warm... So nice... Is this... Is this Death...? No, no... I don't want..." I pleaded, but I knew nobody can hear me, my voice this quiet. "I-I'm sorry, everyone... For the death of Sain... For everything I have done... Please forgive me... I...

"I don't want to die... Not now... Please, don't take me, St. Elimine... I...

"I just blundered..."

And my vision grew black, nothing to be heard or to be seen.

* * *

Hitomi: I'M DONE! YIPPEE! -Zooms around the room- 

Dilandau: Do we have to do this every time...? -Sigh-

Hitomi: -WHACK!- SHUT UP! NOBODY ASKED YOU, DILLYKINS!

Legault: o.o; I was expecting Eliwood to say that to her...

Eliwood: ¬.¬ Hey!!!

Kikai: n.n; Review please...

Hitomi: YEP! n.n HAPPY BIRTHDAY, CHRIS! I hope this was good enough!!!


End file.
